pre-baby crisis
re: the boss's amp-buying trip andrew: ahh guitar! ahh car! ....must play guitar in car! ...
June 27, 2003 @ 2:23 PM | 4 comments | 0 trackbacks
pre-peel
he offered the extra banana gladly - of course she could partake in the fluffy delectability of the tropical fruit. he chewed the banana, savoring its delicate flavor. she began to peel her banana, carefully exposing the even white surface....
June 27, 2003 @ 5:06 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
oof.
all you can eat buffet at mt. everest. we walk in. it's pat's first time at this particular indian restaurant. all pat can say in a slightly confused voice is..."hey, it kinda smells like curry in here."...
July 2, 2003 @ 2:24 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
mmm...bacon...
kara: i'm sorry, did you say "bacon?" andrew: yes, "bacon." as in the breakfast meat. ...
July 15, 2003 @ 9:30 AM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
oh you tease
kara: kate? kate: hold on, i'm kinda in my underwear. mike: I'M completely naked! kara: really? mike: ...no. kara: [shaking fist ala cartoon villain] don't toy with me!! ...
July 15, 2003 @ 4:26 PM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
the Dark Ages
jeff: here's the link to macromedia! download the plugin for godsake! jim: join the rest of the free world! ...
July 21, 2003 @ 3:25 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
not until you clean your plate...
ozzie: W___ is on my plate but at the same time it's been pushed to the side like veggies until C__ is through. ...
July 29, 2003 @ 12:15 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
adobe's newest addition
earl: [gesturing towards jon's handwritten notes] what typeface are these numbers? i like it. jon: ballpoint - new cutting-edge technology. ...
July 29, 2003 @ 12:18 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
...did you say beanbag?
mike: so someone comes up to him at a party and asks him about his name...and this guy like [siiiiiigh] gives an audible sigh. come on, you've gotta know that if you legally change your name to "beanbag america"...
August 4, 2003 @ 9:38 PM | 7 comments | 0 trackbacks
you won't even notice i'm there...
pat: hello, steve? well, i was thinking i'm really tired and i want to get some sleep before this thing tonight so can i come over and like take a nap?....well i know but....i know, but i could sleep...
August 8, 2003 @ 4:54 PM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
leisure suit larry
eric: and they way they tested you to see if you were an adult was this multiple choice test with all of these in-jokes about Jimmy Carter eric: i mean, i guess that's a good way to do it...
August 13, 2003 @ 12:17 AM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
pat: are uh, the coldplay guy and gwyneth married yet? eric: no, i read in Cosmo, they're on the outs ...
September 19, 2003 @ 1:47 PM | 3 comments | 0 trackbacks
my lungs!
kara: i just kept waking myself up with my coughing eric: maybe you can try the all night, sneezing, sniffling, coughing, stuffy head, so you can pass out medicine ...
January 23, 2004 @ 9:26 AM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
i want you now
the time: 7:30. the place: eric & jon's. the show: antiques roadshow. the appraiser: richard madley. his hair and outfit: ridiculous kara: pfffft! ha ha ha ha ha eric: his name is DICK! jon: i want dick madly! eric: ha...
February 17, 2004 @ 10:34 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
lyrics: let's fighting love
Subarashii chinchin mono Kintama no kame aru Sore no oto sarubobo Iie! Ninja ga imasu Hey hey let's go kenka suru Taisetsu na mono protect my balls! Boku ga warui so let's fighting... Let's fighting love! Let's fighting love! Kono...
April 8, 2004 @ 1:34 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
lyrics: i've got something in my front pocket for you
I've got something in my front pocket for you Why don't you reach down in my pocket and see what it is Then grab onto it, it's just for you Give a little squeeze and say, "How do you do?"...
April 15, 2004 @ 3:06 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
page 23
greg storey at airbag commanded and i obeyed: grab the nearest book open the book to page 23 find the fifth sentence post the text of the sentence in your journal along with these instructions. ...
April 15, 2004 @ 4:49 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
plapple
check out this pineapple pillow from linens 'n things. are you kidding me? kudos to the photographer for taking the picture with that big seam up front and center. and i quote: This LNT Home Pineapple Pillow makes a...
July 19, 2004 @ 11:35 AM | 2 comments | 0 trackbacks
our 16th president
courtesy of 'amish in the city' (probably not exact): amish guy: abraham lincoln ate fatback for breakfast every day of his life. not-amish girl: yeah, well i bet he died at, like, 30. amish guy: i don't think that's why...
August 5, 2004 @ 11:28 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
you look lovely in the moonlight...
watching the glitter lamp in the dark: eric: uh, there's something i'm thinking that i want to tell you, but...well, i'm trying to think how to say it without it sounding like an insult. kara: um, well maybe you shouldn't...
August 5, 2004 @ 11:34 PM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
down and dirty with lorem ipsum
kate: how's the online zine site coming kara: pretty slowly since...surprise! no content kate: time to get down with some lorem ipsum? kate: ...
August 23, 2004 @ 10:30 AM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
eric is for hire everyone
eric: beef - it's what's for dinner eric: pork - the other white meat. eric:i'd like to write a slogan for a meat eric: does 'chicken' have one? eric: oh wait. i guess that's the original white meat. eric:...
December 18, 2004 @ 12:35 AM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
because of god
mark: sidenote... so many cute southern protestant women. Most I could never date though. kara: oh. illegal? mark: worse. moral. ...
February 3, 2005 @ 3:23 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
unclean!!!
eric: can you hear? [covers ear with hand] kara: yes. eric: can you hear? [presses harder] kara: yes. eric: can you hear the tv? kara: yes. my other ear isn't blocked. eric: how about now? [sticks finger in ear]...
March 9, 2005 @ 7:57 PM | 2 comments | 0 trackbacks
lightning bolt! lightning bolt!
kara: adult rpgs?! eric: what about a live-action adult rpg? kara: isn't that just "a fantasy"? i just don't understand the point of an online erotic rpg kara: i guess i'm just imagining something like those text-adventures i played...
April 30, 2005 @ 2:17 AM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
gray hairs
kara: look! another gray hair! geez, where are these all coming from?! you used to have like, two and now they're everywhere!! *pluck* *pluck* *failed pluck* *failed pluck* eric: ow! kara: sorry! i'll get it this time... ...*failed pluck*...
May 1, 2005 @ 8:12 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
tap tap tap
any guesses as to what is happening here? antonio: gently, nigel. gently! nigel: i don't think this is going to work antonio: just keep tapping ... antonio: no - gently nigel. you don't want them to explode! ...
May 5, 2005 @ 4:01 PM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
but without the nose bleeds and the inability to spell 'tattoo'
kara: right now on the WB: a new show's premiere - 'beauty and the geek'! it's AWESOME jon: oh my god kara! they made a show about your life! ...
June 1, 2005 @ 7:34 PM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
design travails
antonio: you can't make chicken salad out of chicken shit. ...
June 13, 2005 @ 1:41 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
OSM for short
eric: she's broke. only $80 to her name or something like that kara: don't you have like -$3000 to your name? eric: yeah, but i use a different style of accounting than she does. it's called the "Oh Shit...
June 20, 2005 @ 4:46 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
it was that kind of night
mark: alright, i'm driving this guy home jon: no, i'm driving him home, if you know what i mean. [whispers] sodomy! ...
July 16, 2005 @ 12:03 AM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
see, it's a serious movie! ...oh wait.
'point break' comes on right after csi and the opening credits begin: [waves crash on a beach] eric: hey, this movie starts just like 'american history x'! [cut to guy surfing] eric: well...not now. but it would be great if...
August 9, 2005 @ 8:03 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
he swings both ways
eric: oh man, what's andy dick doing on [the teen choice awards]? they shouldn't let him near those kids. he'll be pickin' up on the girls. ...or boys! ...or both!! kara: ...is he gay? eric: i...i think he's a...
August 16, 2005 @ 8:12 PM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
swiss chard
eric: cecile says she'll eat anything eric: even "swiss chard" kara: HA kara: well, i don't like swiss chard. it's bitter! eric: it has a cool name though eric: like you were trying to say swiss cheese, but got...
September 6, 2005 @ 10:48 AM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
CEOs causing panic
headline reads: Now even the CEO can edit the company Website! kara: did you see that ad at the bottom left? kara: the headline strikes fear into the heart of developers everywhere kara: what developer is going to buy that?...
October 3, 2005 @ 4:10 PM | 2 comments | 0 trackbacks
boobies for woo!*
upon sending me this link: eric: can i rent that place out for parties? * geez, if you don't know the backstory behind that...uh...well it all started with dan and this theory about john woo and his long-suffering assistant...see woo...
November 3, 2005 @ 11:16 AM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
prevenge
eric: mike thinks that "revenge is a dish best served cold" was coined by the writers of star trek kara: uh...i think that's been around for awhile eric: yeah that's what i told him. eric: i came up with...
November 15, 2005 @ 3:53 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
mystery pie
um, so there are some pies and desserts here at work. FREE dessert y'all! so i decided to be adventurous and have some of the pie that no one knew what it was. except that i'm eating it and i...
November 29, 2005 @ 1:14 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
jason was at sea the day they named it
eric: what's the name of that paper your parents get? eric: 'the argonaut'? kara: ha!! kara: no...'the ARGUS'! ...
December 11, 2005 @ 8:18 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
lil kim what?
re: cecile's halloween costume (a pasty)... andrew: i was expecting a tasteful and invisible doily... cecile: this was made from white gaff tape, construction paper and glitter. ...
December 15, 2005 @ 10:22 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
a new year, a new...beginning?
kara: did you see the pic i posted - where jon and eric look like a couple andrew: haha - no kara: http://flickr.com/photos/hyperbolation/80543163/ andrew: haha - lovely - adam and steve kara: ? andrew: adam and eve, not adam...
January 2, 2006 @ 1:52 PM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
what? just me?
during 'king kong' last night (which was awesome), carl denham says to ann darrow, 'i'm someone you can trust. i'm a movie producer.' i immediately and completely involuntarily 'HA!!'-ed, putting the full force of my diaphragm behind the guffaw. it...
January 4, 2006 @ 5:03 PM | 4 comments | 0 trackbacks
“Milk is for babies. When you grow up you have to drink beer.”*
travis: how long has it been since you had real chocolate? antonio: well...i haven't had milk knowingly for...five years travis: i don't know what i'd do if i couldn't have milk! i love it! i eat milk and pizza...
January 18, 2006 @ 2:38 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
this is the sort of thing that seems hilarious when you're part of a couple
kara: where is zump? eric: he's on the bed eric: lying on his side kara: which side eric: (i like how we talk about zump as if he were a real person) eric: his port side kara: lol eric:...
January 18, 2006 @ 10:29 PM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
that's an interesting interpretation of "fine"
at antonio's birthday lunch at reza's: charlie: [in the middle of telling a gruesome story] ...and then a car clipped his head - got him right here [gestures to under his jaw]. he caught just the edge of the bumper....
February 14, 2006 @ 6:39 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
twee?
kara: i just used 'twee' in everyday conversation. i don't think anyone knew what i meant kara: i'm ahead of the curve! kara: ...the dork curve! eric: i think that's a valid word to use, but yeah not everybody...
March 10, 2006 @ 4:36 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
dave werner
hot crackers, is this guy's portfolio awesome. you can find it at okaydave.com and it's the best online portfolio i've ever seen. he uses after effects and flash to create a portfolio that is actually interesting and gives the...
March 15, 2006 @ 11:48 AM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
is...is that a threat?
last week across from the western avenue brown line, next to the delicious opart thai house, i saw new grocery-store-special-style butcher paper signs in the windows of the (ex?) B.P. video (purveyor of adult videos, most certainly). they said: CHUBBY...
March 20, 2006 @ 10:58 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
time is on our side
eric: i like wil wheatons thing about the disposable mp3 player. that sounds good kara: ? eric: that is like what i've been saying there should be for YEARS now. eric: http://suicidegirls.com/news/geek/15147/ eric: they also should make disposable cell...
April 14, 2006 @ 5:29 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
best played inebriated
via IM: me: dude. let's play some tomato tennis travis: hahahhaha - that's basically like making ketchup on people's faces! me: all the more reason to do it! ...
May 18, 2006 @ 9:46 AM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
he'll be here all week, folks
eric: if you ever get together with ben gibbard you have to make him promise never to write a song about you eric: where he uses more than 10 words that each have more than 4 syllables kara: LOL...
June 2, 2006 @ 6:40 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
he stands out in a crowd
pat: OH! pat: i need to go get tacos! kara: oooo pat: yeah, i go to this taco shop that all the immigrants hang out at pat: it's delicious pat: and i think i'm the only one with a...
June 21, 2006 @ 1:42 PM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
he did eat some food though
kara: what i did today chris: what i did ...
July 1, 2006 @ 8:17 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
it's the parenthetical that sells it
eric: hehe, jon sent me some mp3s of this band eric: they sound alright but all their song titles are like, too damn clever for their own good eric: it's like they were all "we like death cab, but...
July 10, 2006 @ 4:46 PM | 2 comments | 0 trackbacks
WHERE?!?
checking out at the music store in lincoln square: charlie: [gestures to poster-covered wall behind the register] what's up with them? they're everywhere lately. kara: uh....[looks at poster wall] who? charlie: [gestures to wall] tapes 'n tapes kara: [looking...
July 12, 2006 @ 11:45 AM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
"syphilis: menace to industry"
eric: http://www.ep.tc/siff-posters/index.html eric: the golden age of syphilis! eric: whoa i like 7/20 eric: it looks like a franz ferdinand album eric: that's what they should call their 3rd album eric: Syphilis! kara: as old as creation! kara: lol...
July 28, 2006 @ 1:17 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
he has a sense of humor, that one
kara: this server is awesome kara: the ----- one i mean andrew: yeah kara: josh gave me an awesome password too andrew: yeah? kara: t3hbrugst@ kara: LOL andrew: haha andrew: nice andrew: i think mine is isuckballs andrew: not...
September 14, 2006 @ 11:00 AM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
the GOP didn't think of this one
...because i guess it's counter to their own interests, if you know what i mean. [looking at a NFP abortion fund site] eric: what's the ED Report kara: executive director eric: reminds me of Erectile Dysfunction kara: i think it's...
September 27, 2006 @ 12:25 PM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
the yates*
dawn: amy will have some plastic cameras at the sale kara: sweet! dawn: you and katie can fight over them kara: ha kara: maybe amy can sell tix to the fight dawn: good idea! kara: katie says we need...
October 5, 2006 @ 11:43 AM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
look at him skitter!
eric: shrimp on a treadmill! kara: HA eric: look at him skitter! kara: duct tape backpack!!! eric: right eric: for "extra load" kara: lol eric: couldn't they have just used a jumbo shrimp? kara: ha eric: this will probably...
October 18, 2006 @ 4:20 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
velcro
eric: did you see that velcro pic? kara: YES kara: it is cool eric: too bad they can't make velcro that big eric: might be scary though i guess kara: that would be a neat art installation kara: giant...
January 1, 2007 @ 11:21 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
clothes make the (wo)man
katie: yay. saturday will be fun! you can wear my mini dress. kara: woo! kara: well we'll see kara: i might wear my usual uniform of tshirt and jeans kara: you know - like, this is me. as i...
January 10, 2007 @ 2:29 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
with LA, it's hard to tell
pat: btw pat: LOVE the myspace pic pat: very hip pat: you'd fit right in out here in LA kara: thanks! kara: ...oh man, is that an insult or a compliment? ...
February 14, 2007 @ 6:09 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
best/worst parental advice ever
a friend's mom told her this when she was young: If it feels good, it must be good for you! ...
February 19, 2007 @ 1:17 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
you decide
cecile: he looks really gay in the photo though cecile: that shirt is not very attractive kara: yes kara: quite gay kara: is he gay? cecile: he's married with 3 kids cecile: british or gay. it should be a...
March 7, 2007 @ 12:30 PM | 3 comments | 0 trackbacks
whoa whoa whoa!
re: retouching photos for an ad antonio: so which did you...? james: i didn't touch the child...i didn't touch the father. [room goes silent. long pause.] ...
March 9, 2007 @ 3:00 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
lust
The Shirt The shirt touches his neck and smooths over his back. It slides down his sides. It even goes down below his belt— down into his pants. Lucky shirt. -Jane Kenyon via verbal privilege via 3quarksdaily...
March 13, 2007 @ 1:41 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
gay.
katie: he dated her for like six years and it turned out that she was gay, then he started dating nako and it happened to him again. ryan: man if that happened to me...i'd never date another girl again....
March 18, 2007 @ 7:16 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
sure. 'violets'.
mom: i think i'll go over to grandma's - put a little more dirt in the plant that i repotted for her then bring her home kara: i have little plants i need to repot kara: i will bring...
April 1, 2007 @ 4:09 PM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
pandora's box
jon: you know what movie was really good from last year? "pandora's box". did you guys see that? kara: hm...no, but it sounds familiar. what was it about? jon: it was amazing - it was like the best movie...
May 29, 2007 @ 10:31 AM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
delete! delete!!
eric: i have my aim logging to an encrypted volume on my new USB drive too eric: there are all sort of "portable" versions of apps that keep all their settings and profile data on the USB drive entirely...
June 22, 2007 @ 4:44 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
knocked up
kara: EVERYONE HAS SEEN KNOCKED UP EXCEPT FOR ME kara: GAH jon: ? jon: who?! kara: everyoneeeeee jon: i'm sorry jon: i thought you said jon: EVERYONE HAS BEEN KNOCKED UP EXCEPT FOR ME ...
June 25, 2007 @ 5:00 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
NERRRRRDS!
pat: wouldn't it be funny if we started planning our weekends around the places we read about that week in comics pat: (and by funny, i mean "probably going to start happening") kara: ...it's totally going to happen...
September 18, 2007 @ 11:31 AM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
LA county fair
the LA county fair was fantastic, but remind me next year to space out the fried foods a little better. in all, i had 7, meghan had 8 and josh had 9: beer-battered french fries fried onion rings fried zucchini...
September 28, 2007 @ 6:13 PM | 2 comments | 0 trackbacks
turkey party -or- why i love meghan, reason # 564
meghan: i'm totally down with copious amounts of meat. ...
November 13, 2007 @ 5:11 PM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
it's me or the dog, or, a typical night at the apartment
maria: here clay - pretend to pet me so she'll get jealous. ...
November 26, 2007 @ 8:35 PM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
we're addicted to facebook over here
re: her flufffriend munny: kara: i fed sebastian a taco! maria: oh i forgot! i have to pet everyone today. ...
December 2, 2007 @ 3:11 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
because, you know...you're almost taller than me
zoe: can i have a piggy-back ride??!? me: ...you can try... ...
December 29, 2007 @ 5:08 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
american gladiator ftw
wolf: i'm smellin' fear an' i'm smellin' blood an' i'm gonna eat you. ...
January 7, 2008 @ 8:43 PM | 1 comments | 0 trackbacks
neologism
re: christian and sean on nip/tuck maria: they're brenemies! brothers, friends and enemies! ...
January 15, 2008 @ 10:59 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
wing is to wang as scotch is to scatch
pat: hey, so tomorrow, after the gallery, since it's super tuesday asa and a bunch of kids are meeting at big wangs to watch the primary results pat: i'd love to go over there around 9ish pat: would you...
February 4, 2008 @ 5:21 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
i don't think it'll sell very well
eric: no abbreviations in scrabble right? eric: man i can spell "faked" with just the letters i have kara: uh...no probably not kara: it won't let you play like, 'IQ' eric: i want to somehow combine that with ziti...
March 3, 2008 @ 7:02 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
the worst meal ever, in a really hilarious and sad sort of way
2 slices of pink baloney, an orange, some gross squishy oreo. some powdered milk. i kept my packet of powdered milk as a souvenir. it doesn't even say "milk" on it. it just is a little white packet that...
March 3, 2008 @ 7:29 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
(chews with mouth open)
kara: (eats ham from plastic package) kara: (and it's delicious) pat: haha pat: i thought you had tons of leftover ham! pat: why from a plastic package? pat: (also, in my mind, you are holding the plastic package with...
March 27, 2008 @ 12:17 PM | 0 comments | 0 trackbacks
buyers remorse, or, shoulda kept the tibook
kara: if the macbook air had a 2200x1600 res screen or whatever my dell has, i'd buy one in an instant, lack of processing power or optical drive be damned kara: the lack of screen real estate is the...